Relationships 101

I can’t believe it’s been 25 days since my last post.  I have all these ideas but seemingly so little time to execute them.  I was thinking though about relationships and in particular about my Queen and me.  This is the second marriage for the both of us.  Ironically the sex in our first marriages was unsatisfactory for the both of us.  I went into this relationship determined to be honest about my sexual wants and not to be afraid to talk about them.  As such, my wife knows all about my kinkiest fantasies and experiences.  Of course some of those are with her…lol   I also know about all of her experiences and I think I know all or most of her fantasies.    A level of trust had to be established to open up like that and I think many married couples are afraid to broach the taboo–that trust is missing.  Perhaps the key in that last sentence is “opening up”–the communication component of our relationship.  For us this is the key piece.

We’ve now been together for 13 years.  It hasn’t always been blissful, but it wasn’t problems between us that made things rocky.  Life happens and sometimes it isn’t pleasant.  My wife and I have faced many difficulties and we have done so together.  I have learned to be more vocal and to speak my mind.  My natural way is to shut up and think things through.  When I do this, my wife thinks I’m withdrawing from her and the temperature can drop in a hurry.  To prevent this I had to force myself to vocalize my thoughts long before I had reached any decision.  Chastity has added an extra layer of communication.  The basic agreement calls for me to write a daily journal and to list my thoughts, experiences as I go through each day.  I’m to discuss any fantasies or problems.  My Queen reads my journal and then will make comments in kind.  She has initiated conversations with me as a result of journal entries.  Writing my thoughts down allows me to more easily deal with difficult topics.  The difficulty might be because of embarrassment or even shame.  Once it’s out in the open though, we can deal with any issue.

Sex between us has always been volcanic.  Still now it’s even better.  I can get so excited that I’m literally shaking, and my excitement feeds hers.  She will often have multiple orgasms and as she squirts, it can be a very wet experience.  I get a sense of pride in pleasing her like that and even if I’m not allowed an orgasm, I have a lot of fun and my horny levels rise.

The punishments I receive for infractions of the rules are not looked forward to.  But I always feel closer to her after I’ve been punished.  She is loving this as my ardor is as it was when we first started dating.  She often says I’m like a teenager.

Our contract runs at this point for another 13.5 months.  I don’t think I want to stop–and I get the sense she doesn’t either.  I may be caged for a very long time.

Still to return to my original idea behind this post–communication is the key to a successful relationship.  I would add that mutual respect (and in my case obedience) and a willingness to support your partner through thick and thin is also important.  I go out of my way not to take my Queen for granted–I believe that is an easy trap to fall into and it can mean death to a relationship.

There you have it.  The secret to a healthy relationship according to Collaredmichael.  Not rocket science, but more common sense.  Still so many people get it wrong.  Have a great day!

Advertisements

7 comments

      • I’m in the process of finding a sub, to mostly gain some experience as a Domme. I have received some bites/offers but I’m hesitant since I don’t know the first thing about being a good Domme. Perhaps from your perspective, would you have any advice for how to treat a sub and how to go about being a confident Domme? Perhaps your wife might be able to lend some advice for the latter. But the question still stands for you as well. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • …needs and desires. Damn auto correct. Ultimately a domme and sub should have a good relationship where trust is not an issue. If you are sure of your likes and your sub is ok with them then that’s half the battle. But you must also be ok with your subs likes. So I think finding a sub boils down to meeting people and exploring their compatibility with you. My wife was not a domme but is a very assertive woman. She knows what she likes and with some encouragement became my domme. At this time though she really isn’t “dommimg” me as much as controlling our sex life. I will edit this later when I’m on my computer. Good luck with exploring your “domme” side. Hopefully you will find a suitable sub soon.

        Like

  1. This is a wonderfully written post.

    Like you, Mr Man and I have weathered many difficulties but they’ve all been from outside of our relationship not between the two of us. He is actually the better communicator of the two of us. Communication really is the key. Open, honest, respectful communication where both of you listen and try your best to understand the other person. I think a lot of people get focused on solely their own needs and they neglect their partner’s needs and needs of the relationship. Everyone’s needs need to be met, and I feel it is the job of both partners to work together on this. We have discovered that common sense, sadly, isn’t very common these days.

    Liked by 2 people

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s